Let’s be honest here – sometimes watching our kids grow and gain independence can be plain SCARY!
My eldest of four daughters embarked on her secondary school journey a couple of weeks ago.
Much trepidation, anxious questions, queezy morning-tummies, new uniform woes, public transport logistics – some of you can totally relate!
I don’t know who was getting more worked up- her or I!
I tried to play it as cool and calm as possible, sharing with her encouraging tales of my own secondary experiences and joys.
I felt like I was suddenly letting slack on the string of the kite I’d been holding so closely.
But it has been good for her, and for me too. My 11 year old is growing up. She is entering a new phase of life and I need to nurture her where she is at.
Yes, independence leads to more risk, more uncertainty. But it is a necessary part of growing into an independent adult.
My youngest, now five, on the other hand, may never be fully independent. And that is ok. I’ll be here for her.
Sometimes her unique path towards independence is downright nerve-wrecking!
She has cerebral palsy and is not walking or able to stand independently for more than a few seconds.
But she is great at cruising the table, the kitchen counters, and more recently, she can pull up at a doorway and open the door!
It is hard to watch her struggle to balance on the handle, push it down, and try to pull backwards without falling over.
Anxious as we are that she is going to fall flat on her face.
We maintain a close distance to save if needed, but give her space to try.
Playing at the playground is another example of her trying to do everything.
Sometimes she even pushes us or our hands away, although without them she will fall right over.
I constantly feel that balance between protection and independence with her.
I want my children to feel enabled to grow in independence, knowing that we will always be here for them and love them unconditionally.
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