Being a Friend's avatar

by Being a Friend

David has never said the word ‘Mum’, yet I regularly shout at my kids to stop yelling mum every two seconds. The Firefly Garden is for everyone connected to a child with special needs. This post for the Firefly Garden blog is by a friend to a special needs mum who would like to remain anonymous. This is her second post about her experience of being a friend, you can read her first post here.

David can’t mess up his room, yet my two can make it look like a tornado has hit theirs! David can’t ask for the latest toy craze advertised, but I sometimes feel that my house resembles an toy catalogue! These annoyances could make it very easy for me to claim how hard my day is. If I was ‘that’ friend who didn’t understand, I am pretty sure I would be telling my best friend just how lucky she is. But I don’t. She isn’t lucky that she doesn’t have to deal with these things. I am sure she would give her right arm to have David bug her in this way. But she is lucky in other ways…

A quote I read once, about having a child with special needs has stuck with me. ‘It’s like buying a ticket for a holiday to America, and arriving in China’. It’s a fabulous location, it’s just not one you were prepared for and you don’t speak the same language. It doesn’t mean that it won’t be a great holiday. David brings so much joy to the people he meets, and his determination to meet his everyday challenges head on has compelled people to go out of their way to fundraise in his name.

We have met many new interesting people on this fundraising journey, we have done some crazy challenges and I, for one, feel lucky to have had the opportunity to experience them. We have also discovered some people just aren’t able to deal with David and the uncomfortable conversations about his condition. We are lucky that we have discovered who our true friends are. As time goes on I hope she feels lucky to have me as her friend. I’m not perfect, but I’m trying.

One thing I have learned is that if in doubt, just ask, she knows a lot more Chinese than me now! If you’d like to share your experiences or story get in touch - email us at [email protected] - you can remain anonymous if you would like to.

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