As parents of children with special needs we know that a single person has the power to make or break our day with something they say or do, whether intentional or not.

I recently met someone who made my day.

We are going to be having some adaptions to our bungalow and have had some builders come round to look at what is required to do the job.

On a visit from one of the builders, Oscar was at home. 

Oscar was very suspicious of the builder. 

I think Oscar thought that he had come round to do some kind of therapy with him and he wasn’t looking too keen. 

I was chatting to the builder and he was making a fuss of the ever-suspicious Oscar when he asked me a question.

‘If you don’t mind me asking, what condition does he have?’ 

I could have hugged him (I didn’t obviously, that would have been a bit weird) and I also could have cried. 

This was a question that I hadn’t expected at all. 

I was expecting him to ask me the ‘dreaded’ question: ‘What's wrong with him?’ but he didn’t. 

To say I was a little surprised was an understatement as no-one (and I mean no-one) has ever asked me this before. 

The funny thing is, this is the question I try and encourage people to ask rather than the ‘dreaded’ question. 

If I ever meet another parent with a child of special needs and feel it may be alright to ask about their child, I always say ‘If you don’t mind me asking, what condition does your child have?’ 

At the end of the day they can only tell me to mind my own business. 

Just because my child has special needs as well I don’t expect them to necessarily tell me about their child and their condition. 

But, I also know to NEVER ask someone the ‘dreaded’ question. 

Other people do not. 

This is why I was so shocked. 

When I explained Oscar’s condition to the builder he did look a bit blank but then again most people do. 

The point is he asked me a question about my child in what I consider to be a respectful way.

Therefore, I was more than happy to answer his question and explain Oscar’s condition and what it may mean for his future. 

So, Dave the builder (why do builders always seem to be called Dave?) thank you for making my day.

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