As of recently, I have found myself in this silent rut.
To be frank, I can’t even figure it out myself, and it seems to be ever changing.
Before, I used to stay at home with Oliver while his older brother Aaden went off to school and my husband Aaron went off to work.
Life was plenty busy with all kinds of appointments and learning to be a new mother in general.
When I met Aaden, my step son, he was five. Life did not require changing diapers, feeding every three hours, nor the countless sleepless nights a baby brings.
I took it all in stride and eventually the sleepless nights tapered off, the feedings grew further apart, and the diapers... well no, the diapers still needed changing every three hours. Lol.
Life became... a bit of a bore. I had all the things in this world to teach my son of course, but growing up as independent as I did, I wanted more for myself.
I wanted to be of more help, financially at least, to my family. I had always had a job and I was soon going on two years without one.
But as much as I tried, it just was not in the cards for me to be able to go out and work and have my son somewhere where he could be watched safely and with all the extra care he personally needed.
I basically couldn’t have my cake and eat it too. I, one of the very few, luckily came across a legitimate opportunity to work from home helping out a friend and her Etsy store. Almost a year later, I still help run the shop for her!
A family of three boys now, my husband and I work and I finished a few classes even at the community college.
I know and pray I will eventually be shown which path to take, and I know it can be different then what my future ultimately will hold.
I know this life of mine is meant to be full and of endless opportunities, I just have to take them one step at a time.
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