It’s that time of year again when the leaves start to change color and gracefully fall off the tree tops. 

There is a slight chill in the air and an abundance of pumpkin-flavored products everywhere you look. 

Once again we start preparing for that wonderful holiday full of sugar and ghouls, Halloween. 

Now that my oldest son Casey is 4, he is really starting to enjoy this holiday.

While we have had fun decorating the house and watching classic movies, what he is most excited about is dressing up and going trick or treating.  

And so begins the secret anxiety attacks I will have about younger son Matthew with his special needs.

Part of Matthew’s genetic disorder has caused a delay in his gross motor skills.

So the costume decisions are much like having a baby.

No mask because there’s no way he is going to keep that on, plus I’ll worry if his airways are blocked.

No face make up because he will just wipe it away.

I start hoping I can find a simple costume in his size or maybe just make it homemade again this year. 

Do we even carry a “treat” bag for Matty?

Because even though he is making leaps and bounds with OT he would have trouble eating most candy. 

I will ask myself a million times if maybe I should just carry Matthew and stand in the background while his brother goes to the door.

This way we can avoid all of those awkward moments with strangers. 

I won’t have to hear them say

“Wow he’s a really big baby. How old is he?...Oh, he’s three?  Doesn’t he walk yet?...Will he walk?...What’s wrong with him?”

I let this fear drive me mad for a few days before I realized what I needed to do for my children. 

I’m going to dress Matthew up in the cutest darn costume I can find. 

I’ll push him in this special tomato chair right along side of his brother and they will giggle to each other at every house we visit. 

Because he deserves to have just as much fun as every other child and it doesn’t have to be about his special needs. 

It’s going to be about his special night with his brother. 

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