I’ve been keeping a huge secret and I’m going to have to come clean.
I’m a fraudster. You see I’ve been given a job that I’m not qualified for…and it’s only a matter of time before I’m found out.
I applied for a new job, to become a Mum, in 2014. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do, but never had the courage to apply before.
I felt a bit nervous about it, but had done my research and thought I could possibly scrape through with the little knowledge I had (ok, I had babysat for a friend on a couple of occasions, but everyone fabricates their CV a little, don’t they?).
Anyway, I don’t know how the mix-up happened, but in 2015, I was given a different job, not the Mum one I was expecting; I was given the role of Special Needs Mum.
Now I am nowhere near qualified for this position. I don’t have any medical background - I haven’t even stayed in hospital for more than a day before I got this job, and feel a bit queasy when I watch 24 Hours in A&E on the telly.
I don’t have any physio experience, never heard of portage, clueless about milk and weaning, and didn’t event know that feeding pumps and gastrostomy tubes existed.
I’m not sure how, but I think I have, just, managed to wing my way through 21 months in the job.
I did try to tell a nurse, when we were first in hospital, that I didn’t think I would be any good at this job, in the hope that she’d take it off me and give me the regular Mum role instead.
Looking back, I guess she was right.
I’m no longer daunted by the medical terms that get thrown about during hospital stays; I’m a regular therapist doing stretches and exercises to help ease aching joints and encourage better head control.
A pretty organised admin assistant making sure that we turn up for all the appointments that have to be squeezed in to each week; a dietician, tweaking the volumes and rates of feeds; a nurse and pharmacist who orders and administers all the required meds (several each day); an advocate for our little girl; a play-pal to entertain and have fun with; and I’m a mum.
Just a mum. Turns out it was the job I wanted, it’s the job I love, even if it is harder than I could have ever imagined, with longer hours than I expected, and without any training plan to work towards.
I hope I don’t get found out actually, I can’t see myself doing anything else.
Now, I wonder what the chances of a payrise are?!
(If you’ve recently found yourself in a new, unexpected role, then hang on in there, chances are you’re doing great!).
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